I’ve been here before, last year I tried to do a Project 365 and failed miserably, but despite that attempt I took on the challenge again in October, for Samhain, and have been trying my best since then to take a photo a day.
But now, only just over 60 photos in, I find myself struggling again, stuck for things to photograph, forgetting, not caring, hating the challenge itself. It’s so hard and, evidently not learning from last year, it’s not something that seems to help my mental health at all. The stress of having to find something each day to photograph is getting on top of me and the photographs I take are poor quality and getting worse. I end up snapping something, anything, with my phone in the evening just so I haven’t failed again, but I’m ashamed to publish the images.
In short, I want to give up again. I want to throw in the towel and never try again. I want to finally learn the lesson that I can’t do it and stop putting myself through this. But I hate failure. So I feel I have to trudge on, hoping that things will improve, that I’ll get into the swing of it, that things will crop up each day that make for good photos, not ones of food or baubles or other nothingness. After all, they say we all have to do things we hate, and those who have completed the challenge do say it’s improved their skills and given them a great sense of pride, and pride is something I’m pretty short on.
So wish me luck as I battle through this treacle like substance that has taken over my camera, darkening everything I see through the lens, making pressing the button a painful struggle and sucking the fun out of photography. And tell me, did you struggle like this with your 365s?